Things children say 2

My aunties took me to the zoo and we saw two politicians.

seeing the politicians

 

To acquire votes, one must kiss old people and babies and that spreads disease.

It is easier to have a baby if you are a cat.

On Saturday we were having dinner with some friends including the headmistress. After about an hour’s conversation – during which time both the girls had been asked if they would like to read – or even watch TV – X announced, suddenly, that this conversation was getting even more boring and could we change the subject and she’d tell us a joke… The headmistress who is used to 1000+ kids jumping to her every command was somewhat taken aback, needless to say!!

[Dictated letter of thanks from 4 year old] I bought a cash register with my money. It has money and a credit card. It has a scanner that goes ping. We play shops with it with mummy and the boys and daddy and my friends. We play libraries too. We have been to X with the youth group. We went biking up the hill. We saw swans and ducks and horses. We loved the horses. They went galloping. We played on the park there. I like the swings.

X has been having rough time with his group friends – hopefully solved now. I gathered yesterday that whatever rejection he’d been experiencing wasn’t entirely unreciprocated and he’d been name-calling. When asked, he told me he’d just been using ‘extraordinary, grown-up words and X didn’t understand’ – Hmm!!

Teacher’s question: What do you do if you’re hungry? Answer: I eat my boiled egg and Mum will eat the yukky bits.

I use the purse quite a lot for putting my money in it. It is usufall because my other purse has just brock.

Mummy gave me a culb [corrected in father’s hand to cube] and X mucked it up for me (I was glad because I wouldn’t dear tough [corrected in father’s hand to touch] it. I was scard to.) Our trip was grate and pusy was very good she sleept and walked around. [Well, a letter is not to be sneezed at even with spelling mistakes!]

Dear X. I guess she is only being ‘normal’ but, oh dear, it is very trying. She has a very cunning ability to pick one bit out of a conversation, and use it totally to her own advantage … I’m not used to such cunningly contrived and clever conversations, and she usually has me floundering at least once a day. The trouble is – when do clever quips become downright insolence?!!

We started the term with a language unit on Noah’s Ark. The kids did some stories today telling the story from one point of view or another. Some of them had lovely bits of dialogue e.g. God said to Noah, “Build an ark, there’s going to be a flood.” “But Go-”. “No buts.”! Or after Noah had told the three sons how to build the ark they all said, “Got you.”!

DIY ark instructions

 

He seems to have no concept of time when he’s actually playing. He’ll clap it right and then play it quite differently and say he’s done it the same – “I AM doing that.” Oh dear. I tried a tape recorder and he just grinned and said, “Well, I like it better that way”!

We were fascinated with two tidbits of news [grandchild] gave us – one she told the people she visited after us that her family was coming south and may be staying with them – which rather surprised the wife!