Pets – love them or hate them

“Puss has recently been fattening himself up for winter and is now very cuddly! We have decided to put him on a diet as he does not need to be so heavy. I wonder if he has been visiting other plates sometimes! He can be very charming if it will get him a feed. When we won’t feed him he pulls everything off the front of the fridge! and then if he still gets no attention he pushes all the magnets under the fridge. Little Monkey!”

“We had to replace the dog, we now have another welfare dog, female, medium boxer type with white short hair and a brown patch over one eye and ear!”

“The kitten has grown – I can just hear you say ‘guess what!!’ or something similar! He is beautiful and probably the most spoilt in the world. [Partner] is gushier than I am! We had him fixed last week – he was v. sore for a day but seems to be back to normal now!”

“X has gone up the village and left the puppy with me in my study – which is not conducive to concentration, as I have to be constantly defending my bookcases from being ransacked. I wouldn’t mind if she was going to read them. She has already eaten two throat sweets from beside my bed today, and chewed the remaining two so that they will have to be thrown away.”

“…we are supposed to be going there next July. However X, the dog, missed us so much that if she is still alive we might have to cancel next year. She is on senile dementia pills now – which I might share with her!”

“X has had a stray cat hanging around her house who seems very lonely and hungry – so she caught it as the vet said if she brought it in he’d rehouse it – but when she took it in last week the vet said it was very sick and it would be kinder to put it down – she was very sad – she is such a beautiful person and so kind.”

“They own a Doberman dog which is the most timid animal I’ve ever met. It was attacked by another dog as a pup and X thinks she has never quite recovered.”

“Puss is still on the diet but doesn’t seem to be getting any smaller! 8 kgs! He is a big cat but is still overweight. We might have to try harder!”

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